You are not alone in this endless waking nightmare

[Image description: A dark tunnel with a light at the end. Image by Tama66 on Pixabay]

Hi everyone, I am sick to my soul. I write to process my feelings, but I am not sure how coherent I will be. Once again, our racist and misogynistic country proves just how racist and misogynistic it is. It revels in cruelty and ignorance, electing a convicted felon, rapist, and insurrectionist into power despite the breathtaking level of harm he did the last time, wiping out generations’ worth of progress.

I do not have easy platitudes for you. I can only share your grief and fear and despair at the horrors that are to come. I am as heartbroken as many of you are. I am enraged. Not just at those who voted for fascism and authoritarian rule, but for our own incumbent leaders, who swung moderate and courted conservatives and who voted again and again to support and fund genocide, knowing it would cost them needed votes. 

This morning, I drove my kids to school, wondering what sort of future awaits them. What sort of future awaits us all, especially our community members who are of color, trans, disabled, gay, immigrants, poor, elderly, homeless, and others already bearing the brunt of the cruelty of capitalism and white supremacy. Will there be a future for Palestinians, Congolese, Sudanese, Ukrainians, and other people whose fates rest on the whims of the US empire.

I don’t have many words to comfort you, but I will try, because that’s all any of us can do in this moment. We need to set aside time to grieve. Grieve for the inequities that brought us to this place. Grieve for the difficult road ahead. Grieve for the lives that will be lost because of the malice and vindictiveness that will shape the policies our communities must further endure. Grieve at what could have been, the hope and optimism and the brighter reality we could have had. 

Let’s give ourselves the time and grace to feel the rage and sadness and pain. But let’s remind ourselves that we are not alone during these times of collective despair. We who believe in a just and equitable world have each other. Reach out and check in with the people you care about. Check in with your team. Create space to be together. During these times, it is always community that saves us. 

If you are up for it—and it’s OK if you’re not—here are some resources from various colleagues. I find them helpful and grounding. 

This piece from my friend, composer Byron Au Yong. It contains a moving song “Survival Is Resistance,” from the Activist Songbook, with a powerful message from communities that have endured horrendous injustice and still found strength and hope, because, as we know, this is not the first time humanity has chosen violence and oppression:

 “Resistance is the crater of the bomb we turn into a pond to fish in, the old clothes and songs our broken hearts are stitched in when we see our new home in the distance, because our survival is resistance.”

Here’s a poem that I turn to often in times of despair: “We Were Made for These Timesby Clarissa Pinkola Estes. Here’s an excerpt:

“You are right in your assessments. The lustre and hubris some have aspired to while endorsing acts so heinous against children, elders, everyday people, the poor, the unguarded, the helpless, is breathtaking. Yet, I urge you, ask you, gentle you, to please not spend your spirit dry by bewailing these difficult times. Especially do not lose hope. Most particularly because, the fact is that we were made for these times. Yes. For years, we have been learning, practicing, been in training for and just waiting to meet on this exact plain of engagement.”

Here, meanwhile, are 10 ways to be prepared and grounded now that Trump has won, with practical advice on what we must do now:

“The key to taking effective action in a Trump world is to avoid perpetuating the autocrat’s goals of fear, isolation, exhaustion and disorientation.”

I’m going to give myself time to grieve and despair. But I also did not go into the line of work of fighting injustice thinking that it would always be easy. We knew this work would be hard. And while it seems insurmountable, there is hope as long as we don’t give up on one another and what we can achieve together. My friend Chris Talbot-Heindl reminds me of Grace Lee Boggs’s quote: 

“Every crisis, actual or impending, needs to be viewed as an opportunity to bring about profound changes in our society. Going beyond protest organizing, visionary organizing begins by creating images and stories of the future that help us imagine and create alternatives to the existing system.”

Let us channel the courage and strength of civil rights leaders in the past, who faced similar, if not oftentimes significantly more difficult challenges. We honor them and their work by taking care of one another, building community, and continuing to fight for the world we know is possible. 

Please take care of yourself. And know you are not alone. I am with you.

9 Tips for Dealing with Election-Related Stress and Anxiety

[Image description: A black and white cat with big piercing blue eyes. Image by FelixMittermeier on Pixabay]

Hi everyone. If you’re like me, you’re probably going to be anxious all day due to the Elections. I’ve cast my vote for Harris/Walz. Over the past few weeks I also sent out dozens of postcards to people in swing states. I know many of you have been on the forefront, calling people, knocking on doors, and trying to convince wayward friends and relatives. 

Still, it is stressful. We’ve been on edge for a decade now. I remember 2016 and the horrific years that followed. Most of us are more traumatized than we care to admit. So, here’s some advice I’m providing, mainly as a reminder for myself. According to my therapist, I often use humor when I’m stressed, so keep that in mind: 

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Scary Nonprofit Stories for Halloween, 2024

[Image description: A lit up jack-o-lantern with a wide grin stands at the end of a still lake. Behind it, and in the reflections in the water, stand several tall leafless trees, with orange sunlight streaming through them. Image by ELG21 on Pixabay]

Hi everyone, as Halloween is coming up, here are some stories guaranteed to give you shivers. As usual, they are not for the faint of heart, so don’t read them by yourself. Write your scary stories in the comment section.

BURIED

The nonprofit was small and scrappy. The staff prided themselves on being resourceful, so they always took whatever free stuff that was offered and hardly ever threw anything away. A pallet of math text books. 3,000 swag pens from another org that had shuttered. 200 infinity scarves.

One day, their event coordinator went missing, his phone left behind mysteriously at his cubicle. For days the community searched for him, with no signs of his whereabouts. Sometimes, though, the staff could swear they heard pounding or scratching coming from the walls.

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Dirt-cheap and easy nonprofit Halloween costumes! [video]

Hi everyone, this week, on October 24th at 12pm Pacific Time, I’ll be in discussion on the topic of imposter syndrome with Esther Saehyun Lee and Aleeka Morgan. It’s FREE; captions enabled. Register here. Read Esther’s essay “You’re not feeling imposter syndrome, you are an imposter: Identity and belonging in nonprofit work” by Esther in advance.

Halloween is coming up, and you’re probably invited to a bunch of parties. Of course, if you’re a nonprofit professional, you probably don’t have much money to spend on costumes, nor time to make something elaborate.

So here are some costumes that are quick and easy and can be put together with stuff you probably already have! Check it out, as well as last year’s costume ideas below (I don’t know how anything can beat “Strategic Flan”), and add your costume ideas in the comment section!

Last year’s costume ideas, still relevant for this year:

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It’s time we acknowledge that “family foundation” is a weird concept

[Image description: A cute little hedgehog in the grass, staring at something to our right. They have white fur and white spines and big dark eyes and a little brown nose. And I checked that this is not AI-generated. Image by szabfer on Pixabay]

A couple of announcements before we tackle today’s topic. In acknowledgement of Indigenous Peoples Day, just the annual reminder for all of us that less than one-half a percent of philanthropic dollars go to Native American-led nonprofits in the US, which is disproportional to the Native American population, which is 2.6%. So, funders out there, increase your giving. The rest of us, donate to Native orgs and support Native businesses and individuals.

Meanwhile, a couple of webinars that might interest you. This week on October 17th at 4:30pm Seattle time, there’s a virtual rally for Harris/Walz, with specific focus on getting more representation for the nonprofit sector in the new administration.

Also, you may have read this amazing essay “You’re not feeling imposter syndrome, you are an imposter: Identity and belonging in nonprofit work” by the brilliant Esther Saehyun Lee. Next week, on October 24th at 12pm Pacific Time, I’ll be in discussion on this topic with Esther and our colleague Aleeka Morgan (director of Nurturing Wāhine Fund). It’s FREE; captions enabled. Register here [None of us are getting paid for this, so expect a casual conversation probably filled with cussing].

Continue reading “It’s time we acknowledge that “family foundation” is a weird concept”