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Nonprofit AF

Exploring the fun and frustrations of nonprofit work

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funding

Stressed about funding? Here’s a “Supportive Funder ASMR” video!

Posted on September 9, 2024 by Vu

A while ago, I learned about ASMR, which stands for Autonomous Sensory Meridian Response. You can read about it in the link above, but basically it’s audio and videos designed to give you positive, tingly feelings. There are videos where people pretend to shampoo your hair; others where they’re eating various foods and you can hear the crunching sounds their mouths make. Very interesting stuff, look it up.

Anyway, we need more positive, tingly feelings. Nonprofit work can be so stressful, especially when it comes to funding and fundraising. Luckily, we have amazing program officers who are supportive and encouraging. However, not everyone is fortunate to have those program officers in their lives, or if they do, those funders aren’t always available. So I made an ASMR video featuring a supportive funder. Listen to it when you’re stressed out about funding. For best effect, listen to it on a loop while wearing head phones and eating some dark chocolate in a supply closet.

[Also, I’m new to embedding videos on this blog. Let me know if there are any glitches like you can access them on your phone or something]

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Posted in Funder Relations, funding, Fundraising, Humor 0 Comments

Is it just as hard to give out money as it is to seek it?

Posted on May 7, 2024 by Vu

[Image description: A squirrel with fluffy ears, peeking out from behind the trunk of an ivy-covered tree, looking inquisitive. Image by mariuszopole on Pixabay]

Hi everyone, if you’re interested in being involved with the Crappy Funding Practices movement, please join a special meeting we’re hosting on May 14th at 10am Pacific Time, where we’ll update you on what’s been going on, and present the different options for you to plug into. Register here. See you then!

A few years ago, I was in Oxford, speaking on a panel at a conference with colleague Jessamyn Shams-Lau, who is the lead author of Unicorns Unite: How Nonprofits and Foundations Can Build Epic Partnerships; we were there to promote the book and discuss how nonprofit leaders and funders could work more effectively together. during the Q&A, a program officer pushed back, hinting that we panelists were unfairly critical of funders, and declaring that giving out funds is just as difficult seeking it. Several funders in room, and a few nonprofit leaders, nodded in agreement.

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Posted in Funder Relations, funding, Fundraising, Grantwriting 0 Comments

10 boring, predictable responses often made by enablers of crappy funding practices

Posted on January 30, 2024 by Vu

[An adorable raccoon, their head resting on their paw, which is resting on a tree trunk. This raccoon has nothing to do with this blog post, but the inclusion of this picture makes people more likely to click on it. Image by Chalo Garcia on Unsplash]

Hi everyone. Before we start this week’s topic, check out Memphis Music Initiative’s latest hilarious and catchy music video, “I Hope Like Hell We Get This Grant.”

Crappy Funding Practices (CFP) has been building momentum. Join in the fun on LinkedIn! This is the movement where we call out foundations publicly and by name who engage in practices that waste nonprofits’ time and energy when there are so many societal issues to tackle. Making a grantee write a quarterly report for a $2500 grant? We’re calling you out. Telling grant applicants they can’t spend more than 10% on overhead? We’re calling you out. Making grant applicants use your budget format, which is in Word? We’re calling you out.

Declaring a grant application deadline but then saying you’re only going to review the first 100 submissions? We’re calling you out and likely also bestowing upon you a Ghost Orchid Award for Rare but Super Crappy Funding Practices, which will come with press releases and probably an award ceremony where your team will be invited to dress up in evening formal wear and explain how you came up with such a clueless and heinous decision.

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Posted in Funder Relations, funding, Fundraising, Grantwriting, Humor, philanthropy 0 Comments

Funders, do you have Main Character Syndrome and are engaging in crappy funding practices? We’re coming for you!

Posted on January 8, 2024 by Vu

[Image description: A duck, photoshopped onto a background that looks like they’re stepping out from behind a sheet of wrinkled purple paper, kind of like how someone would step onto the stage from behind the curtains. Image by NoName_13 on Pixabay]

A few weeks ago, I wrote a post on how no funder deserves their own unique snowflake financial or outcomes report from grantees, and that they should just accept nonprofits’ annual report and comprehensive financial statements. A colleague pointed out that these burdensome and nonsensical requirements are a result of many funders having a “Main Character Syndrome” (MCS).

MCS, according to my quick consultation with fellow cool young people, is basically where someone thinks they are the main character in the universe, and that everyone else is just a support character in their fascinating and enthralling story. And they act like it. This phenomenon helps to explain many things that happen in our sector, such as the egotistical executive director who needs to take credit for everything. Or the board member/donor who demands to be treated like royalty and who gets offended at the slightest injury to their image or sensibilities.

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Posted in Funder Relations, funding, Fundraising, Grantwriting, philanthropy 0 Comments

Foundations: Stop taking a year off to do your strategic planning!

Posted on October 9, 2023 by Vu

[Image description: A golden mask, the kind that might be used at a masquerade party. Image by Julio Rionaldo on Unsplash]

Hi everyone. It is October, which means my favorite holiday is coming up: Halloween, a time when children can dress up in costume and go door-to-door for free food, while adults dress up as sexy versions of healthcare workers and politicians.

And of course, it’s also a time to give ourselves a good scare. In our sector, there’s plenty of terrifying things: Restricted funding, 360 evaluations, lack of retirement savings, and creepy colleagues who tip-toe behind you in darkened hallways and whisper, “Would you consider joining the gala planning committee?” I’ll tell you a story about one of the scariest things that happen though. Make sure all the lights are on and you’re not by yourself:

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Posted in Funder Relations, funding, Fundraising, Grantwriting, philanthropy 0 Comments

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