9 nonprofit-inspired cocktail recipes for your holiday party

[image description: Two wine glasses filled with a yellowish cocktail, each having a small bunch of red currants on the bottom and ice and lime wedges floating on top. Image obtained from Pixabay.com]
Hi everyone, this will be the last post of the year. I thought about writing a recap of 2017, maybe a list of profound lessons we learned as a sector or something. But that takes way too much thinking and analysis, which I can’t really do after three glasses of Gewürztraminer, the nonprofit of the wine family (sweet, underappreciated, with a hint of bitterness).

So instead, we’re going to talk about cocktails. It’s been a while since we’ve had a follow up to Nonprofit Cocktail recipes. However, since all of us are likely hosting holiday parties, it is a good time to brush up on our mixology. If you’re sick of the boring old eggnog, try these nonprofit-inspired recipes below at your next gathering, and wow your friends and family. Please drink and serve responsibly. Continue reading “9 nonprofit-inspired cocktail recipes for your holiday party”

7 nonprofit scary stories to tell in the dark

[Image description: A hand, glowing blue, with a creepy blurry blue background. Image obtained from Pixabay.com]
Hi everyone. I usually don’t post more than once a week, but I love Halloween. It’s my favorite holiday. So here are some terrifying stories set in the sector. Read them, but beware, they are really, really scary, so make sure you are prepared. Happy Halloween.

The Salary History

Every day, Francine applied for jobs, spending time to carefully tailor and craft her resume and cover letter. There were never any responses. It seemed hopeless, until she saw a posting for a job that seemed perfect for her. But as she scanned to the bottom, a sinking feeling swelled up in her stomach. From outside her cold attic room, a crow cackled ominously. There was no salary range listed. A shiver ran through her spine as her eyes rested on a solitary line “Please submit resume and cover, including your salary history for the previous three positions.” Three positions. Three. Why, she thought, what does why previous salary at a previous position have anything to do with this completely different job? What sort of unethical BS is this? Desperate to pay rent and to eat, she applied anyway. Francine got the job, and because she had been underpaid before, she was now doomed to be underpaid at this job too. And the next job. And the next. And at all jobs in her future. Continue reading “7 nonprofit scary stories to tell in the dark”

14 irritating jargon phrases, and awesome new cliches you should use instead

[Image description: An emu, with two red eyes. We only see its head and part of its long neck. The background, out-of-focus, is green and yellow, suggesting trees and other plants. Image obtained from pixabay.com]
Hi everyone. I’m trying to focus more on positive or just lighter stuff on this blog for the next few weeks, but people really need help in Mexico and Puerto Rico, so please click on those links and donate. 

We’ve examined irritating jargon in two previous posts (“21 irritating jargon phrases…” and “17 irritating jargon phrases…”), but when all the rhubarb is harvested, there are still more. So here’s some more jargon, and new clichés to replace them with. Thanks to the NAF Facebook community and other colleagues for the suggestions, some of which are jargon, some just cliches. We’ll save for last the most annoying jargon we all use, but otherwise, these are in no particular order. Continue reading “14 irritating jargon phrases, and awesome new cliches you should use instead”

23 quotes by famous people if they had worked in nonprofit

[Image description: A grey-scale drawing of Muhammad Ali’s face. He is looking to his left. Image obtained from Pixabay.com]
Hi everyone. I was on vacation this week, so did not have the mental energy to write a serious post. So here are quotes by famous people if they had worked in nonprofit. Check out the previous installments and write yours in the comment section. Continue reading “23 quotes by famous people if they had worked in nonprofit”

Imagine if Apple had to run like a nonprofit

We nonprofits deal with unique challenges that our for-profit colleagues never have to think about. If you ever sat in the dark for hours listening to REM and eating Otter Pops and wondering what it would like for a large for-profit like Apple to have to run like a nonprofit, wonder no more! I’ve done it for you this week! (What, like your vacation is so much more interesting). And I asked NAF’s web designer and artist, Stacy Nguyen, to draw up some comics.

At the retail store

Customer: Hi, I’d like to buy this latest iPhone. How much is it?

Apple employee: $700 dollars.

Customer: Here you go. But I want most of this money to be spent on direct costs. No more than $70 should be going to indirect costs like rent, insurance, etc. I also don’t want any of this $700 to go toward advertisement or staff salaries.

Apple employee: We’ll designate these restrictions in our systems.

Customer: At the end of the year, I’d like a report on what you spent this money on.

Apple employee: We provide quarterly financial reports, and would be glad—

Customer: No no no. I don’t want the financial reports on your entire company. I only want a report on what my $700 specifically was spent on. Only my $700.

Apple employee: OK…Would you like to be added to our e-newsletter list? Continue reading “Imagine if Apple had to run like a nonprofit”