Hi everyone, before we get started, here are a couple of cool and free webinars that you can register for. If you’re interested in exploring shared leadership, check out this session on December 1st, led by Ananda Valenzuela and Roshni Sampath, two brilliant thinkers on the subject. Meanwhile, if you need a jolt of energy, join the virtual Nonprofit Day celebration on November 30th; I’ll be delivering a short pep-talk there. Both events are free thanks to various sponsors, and captioning will be available.
I got feedback earlier that Nonprofit AF has gotten a bit too serious over the past few years. You’re right, this blog needs more humor! And what is the highest form of humor? Dad jokes! I hope you enjoy these below. Contribute your own in the comment section or go on twitter with the hashtag #NonprofitDadJokes and add to the fun before Twitter collapses.
- What’s yellow and custardy and may help you be more effective over the next three years? A strategic flan!
- Why did the everyone at the nonprofit slowly back away when the facilitator came? They were told it was a staff retreat
- Why do pirates like the US nonprofit sector so much? There are 501 seas
- Did you hear about the donor who brought a saucepan to the fundraiser? He thought he was supposed to braise the paddle!
- Why did the nonprofit professional plant so much Mentha piperita? He was working on his retiremint
- “Edna yawns so much at the governance meetings.” “Who can blame her; she’s the bored president!”
- What do nonprofit professionals say when they want to hear gossip? “Spill the equi-tea!”
- What’s cold and yummy and a good value for your money? ROIcecream
- Why did the evaluation consultant take a bunch of headshots? He wanted to be a logic model
- What type of philanthropic support do bunnies love most? Multi-ear general hopperating funds!
- “Wow that building looks so sturdy.” “Of course! It’s a capacity building!”
- Which variety of apples is the most stressful to eat? Gala
- Did you hear about the donors who went to the zoo and rolled their eyes and walked past the musk ox that was sleeping quietly? It was a silent ox shun.
- Why was Bambi greeting guests at the community event? He was a volundeer
- I wrote a joke about a grant from MacKenzie Scott, but few people got it.
- Why is the banana so happy? It’s time for the annual a-peel!
- Did you hear about nonprofit that was researching the history of quarters, dimes, and nickels? It was developing a theory of change
- Why did John speak so slowly about his org’s mission and then stumbled at the end? He was making an escalator speech
- Did you hear about the foundation trustees who cryogenically froze their brains? They wanted the foundation to exist in pituitary
- “Jason, I’m curious why you went sailing, horseback riding, and golfing all last week but didn’t take PTO…?” “You told me to pursue Donor-Advised Fun as part of my workplan!”
If you didn’t laugh at these jokes, just remember that genius is never appreciated in its own time.