The Beautiful Development Director & The Mysterious Stranger

By Sarah Frazier

Couples-holding-handsThere one was a beautiful Development Director who lived by herself in a big empty house way up on the hill. Every day she would go to work for a wonderful, yet small non-profit organization and every day she would raise some money. Most of it was unrestricted too! She was loved by her Executive Director, and cherished by the Board. Every donor felt welcome and engaged by the organization. Every event exceeded its goal, with minimal hair lost by the staff. 

She worked for the nonprofit for many years. Each year the budget grew, but each fiscal year ended in the black. They were all happy. 

Then one day the Development Director met a tall, dark stranger. No one really remembered when the strange man appeared, but suddenly it seemed he was everywhere. He attended the events, he volunteered, he even made donations to the annual appeal.

“I’m not sure I trust that stranger,” said the Executive Director. But everyone agreed that the beautiful Development Director seemed happy and so no one thought anything of it. As the years went by, the Development Director and the strange man got married. Everyone was happy for them because the Development Director continued to go to work every day and raise money.

But one day the Development Director appeared before the Executive Director with pale, green skin and dark circles under her watery eyes. The ED clutched her pearls and gasped at the once beautiful Development Director. “What’s happened to you?” asked the Executive Director, “It’s that terrible stranger, isn’t it?”

“Yes” moaned the Development Director. “I’m pregnant.”

“Oh. Well, that’s actually good news,” said the Executive Director, “In fact, we have prepared a maternity leave policy, even though as we are such a small organization we are not required to have one to comply with the Federal Family Medical Leave Act.”

“No,” cried the Development Director, “but I have done the math and I will not be able to come back to work after I have my baby because my take home pay cannot cover the costs of childcare.”

“NOOOOOOO” wailed the ED. She punched angrily at the sky while the beautiful Development Director disappeared in a puff of smoke, never to be heard from again – until her children were enrolled full-time in public school.

I know this story to be true – BECAUSE I AM THAT DEVELOPMENT DIRECTOR! Mwahaha!