We in nonprofit work a lot and oftentimes neglect important things. Like flossing. And exercise. Let’s try to be more mindful about self-care. There are many benefits of yoga, for example, which are the ancient practices of training your mind, body, and spirit. Now, you may be thinking, “I don’t have time for yoga; I have an important grant to write.” Well, even a few minutes a day can be extremely helpful to get you more relaxed and productive. Here are a few yoga positions inspired by nonprofit work that you can do today. Do not exert yourself if you are a yoga beginner. Try one or two poses each week, and increase the variety as you advance. Also, if your office can’t afford air conditioning this summer, all the better, because hot yoga is even more beneficial. Continue reading “The Downward-Facing Budget and other nonprofit yoga poses”
Category: nonprofit field
Some reflections on my old job before I start my new job
Hi everyone, I realized that last Friday was my last day as Executive Director of my organization. Today’s post may be rambly and a little sentimental, reflecting on nine years at an organization that I love. Please indulge me this week, and next week we will be back to nonprofit hilariousness (such as “Lessons we nonprofits can learn from ‘Naked and Afraid’,” a totally awesome show with much to teach us, such as if your staff or board is naked in the wilderness—maybe as a very creative retreat—the first thing you should do is make some basic undergarments for your team out of grass or leaves, since there may be leeches.) Continue reading “Some reflections on my old job before I start my new job”
If You Give a Board Treasurer a Cookie, and other classic children’s books about nonprofit work
Today, I want to talk about children’s books. I am so sick of these children’s books that my one-year-old makes me read each day. You try to see how charming “Guess How Much I Love You” is after the 80th time! All right, nutbrown hares, we get it, you love each other, great! And yes, brown bear, brown bear, you see a red bird, awesome, and red bird, red bird, you see a blue horse, wonderful.
But then I got this great idea! I should write children’s books! They are short as hell! And if one becomes a best-seller, I’ll be rich, rich! The conventional wisdom is to write about stuff that you know. And what do I know? Nonprofit work, of course. I can write children’s books about nonprofit work! Here are some that I’ve started working on. There is so much that children can learn from our field. Just imagine parents reading these books to their kids each night. Maybe these books might even inspire some kids to grow up wanting to be nonprofit warriors. Read these texts below, and let me know what you think, and other children’s book ideas you have.
The Runaway ED
Once upon a time there was an Executive Director, and she wanted to run away. So she said to her board chair, “I am going to run away.”
Her board chair said, “If you run away, I will come and find you and bring you back, for you are my Executive Director.”
“If you come and find me,” said the ED, “then I will become a strategic plan and hide on the shelf.”
“If you become a strategic plan and hide on the shelf,” said her board chair, “then I will become an intern who accidentally stumbles on you.”
“If you become an intern who accidentally stumbles on me, then I will become a raw piece of cauliflower on a snack platter at a community gathering, which no one will eat.”
“If you become a raw piece of cauliflower on a snack platter at a community gathering, which no one will eat, I will become a desperate hungry vegan and find you.”
“If you become a desperate hungry vegan who will find me,” said the ED, “then I will become an invitation-only foundation that is like Fort Knox to get through.”
“If you become an invitation-only Foundation that is like Fort Knox to get through, I will become the best friend of one of the trustees’ daughters and I will get through to you.”
“Aw, shucks,” said the ED, “well, in that case, I might as well stay here and be your ED.”
And she did.
“Can I have a raise?” she asked.
“No.”
If You Give a Board Treasurer a Cookie
If you give a board treasurer a cookie, he may ask who’s paying for the cookie.
When you answer that you’re using funds he approved on the budget, he’s probably going to ask to see a copy of the budget.
When you give him the budget, he’s going to ask for the latest balance sheet.
When you show him the balance sheet, it may remind him of a training he attended about the importance of opening a line of credit.
He’ll ask you to open a line of credit. He might get carried away and say he’ll go to the bank himself.
When he goes to the bank, he might notice that your signatories are not up to date.
He’ll send out an email to the finance committee asking to discuss this at the next meeting.
You’ll have to coordinate the meeting and remind everyone. And of course, you have to get snacks.
And chances are…cookies will be on sale.
The Very Tired Development Director
In the light of a fluorescent lamp, a Development Director sat hunched over an organization’s fundraising plan.
On Monday, he organized one luncheon, but the organization still needed money.
On Tuesday, he applied to two employee giving campaigns, but the organization still needed money.
On Wednesday, he launched three crowd-funding initiatives, but the organization still needed money.
On Thursday, he wrote four grants, but the organization still needed money.
On Friday, he called five major donors, but the organization still needed money.
On Saturday, he wrote 10 thank-you emails, sent out 18 handwritten notecards, went to coffee with 5 potential donors, checked the grant calendar, looked at the annual event program brochures of 9 similar organizations to scan their sponsors, called 4 board members to remind them of their tasks, emailed 3 local businesses, and led a program tour. He was exhausted.
The next day was Sunday again. The Development Director stayed at home and spent time with his family, and he felt much better.
He was due for a much-needed vacation, so he took some time off. A week later he came back and…
He was still an awesome Development Director who continued to keep the organization and its important work going.
The Giving Nonprofit
Once there was nonprofit organization, and it loved the community and the funders supporting its work. Every year, the organization would continue to serve the people in its community. And each year, funders would provide funding so it could continue its programs. And the organization loved its funders and its community very much. And the community was happy.
But time went by, and the nonprofit and its programs grew older. The funders didn’t come as frequently, and the nonprofit was often left alone.
Then one day, a funder passed by, and the nonprofit said, “Come, funder, come to my programs and meet the kids we serve and let’s make the community better.”
“My foundation has shifted its priorities,” said the funder, “we only fund new and innovative programs. Do you do anything new and innovative?”
“I’m sorry,” said the nonprofit, “we have been building this program for several years. It is not new. But it is good, and it serves many wonderful people.”
And the funder left, and the nonprofit was sad again.
Then one day, another funder passed by, and the nonprofit said, “Come, let’s have lunch and talk about our community. Support our work and help kids achieve a brighter future.”
“We no longer fund direct service work,” said the funder, “that’s a Band-Aid solution. Do you do Collective Impact?”
“I’m sorry,” said the nonprofit, “we have been involved, but not significantly, since our community still needs direct service.”
And so the funder left and went far, far away. The nonprofit was now very tired and sad.
And after a long time, another funder came by.
“I’m sorry,” said the nonprofit, “I don’t have anything innovative, just good programs that serve people. My programs only target specific neighborhoods, not whole states, in case you want something farther reaching. The programs serve unique populations, so they might not be scalable, in case that’s what you seek. I am not sure I have anything that you might like to fund.”
“It’s OK,” said the funder, “we provide general operating grants focused on outcomes, and I heard you do some great stuff, so here is a grant so you can continue to serve the community.”
And the nonprofit was happy.
And its staff went to happy hour.
***
For more nonprofit kids’ books, read “Where the Sustainable Things Are” and other nonprofit children’s books
And also part 3, “Green Eggs and Strategic Plans” and other nonprofit children’s books
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General operating funds, admin expenses, and why we nonprofits are our own worst enemies
This week I was on an NDOA panel to discuss the importance of unrestricted funds. I was there with another nonprofit leader as well as two funders, and all of us, everyone in the room, agreed that general operating funds are awesome. General operating funds are like Tyrion Lannister of Game of Thrones, or Darryl Dixon of The Walking Dead, or, you know, Sophia from The Golden Girls: It is flexible, it is adaptable, and that’s why it gets stuff done.
For years I have been railing against restricted funding to anyone who would listen. I wrote a piece imagining what it would be like if a bakery ran with the same funding restrictions as a nonprofit: “I need a cake for some gluten-free veterans. I can pay you only 20% of the cost of the cake, and you can only spend my money on eggs, but not butter, and certainly not for the electricity; you have to find someone else to pay for the oven’s electricity. Also, you need to get an accounting firm to figure out where you’re spending my money, but you can’t use my money to pay for that service.” (Read the full post: “Nonprofit funding: Ordering a cake and restricting it too“). Continue reading “General operating funds, admin expenses, and why we nonprofits are our own worst enemies”
9 tips to ensure your event is vegan-friendly
Today, I want to talk about a pervasive issue, one that has seen very little daylight, yet it affects a significant number of nonprofit professionals each year: Crappy, crappy vegan food at nonprofit functions.
Now, this post today is not trying to convert anyone to veganism, which is a diet free of all animal products, even though peer-reviewed studies show that people who switch to a balanced plant-based diet become on average 38% better looking to members of both sexes and are much more likely to win the lottery. Continue reading “9 tips to ensure your event is vegan-friendly”